cafe bleu was noticeably empty during the february “azns in entertainment” mixer. this was my first outing in los angeles since lovely and i had moved in earlier that month, and it was quickly recognized that in my efforts to avoid another east coast winter, i had migrated cross-country into a hot zone. each of us who entered the bar was greeted by a similar disclaimer: soooooo apparently a korean airlines flight attendant got the coronavirus and she had spent a couple of days hanging out all over ktown INCLUDING THE SPOT RIGHT NEXT DOOR. the statement was uttered in a tone as closely resembling a casual aside as possible, in a no big deal kind of a way, and met with an ohhh… also in a no big deal kind of a way, followed by everyone looking down at their glasses of freshly-poured overpriced mediocre drinks, then a soft glance at the bartenders, as if we could read further information in their faces as they made screwdrivers in the dark. on the big screen, the lakers were clearly losing a game being broadcast by a network still figuring out how to move on in a kobe-less world. everybody in LA was just trying to be a good sport. i went to the bathroom to wash my hands.

networking events are hard, even in the absence of a pending pandemic and the death of a legend – but one of my great discoveries thus far this year is that i much prefer the kind where i might end up in convowith a writer for she-hulk in LA as opposed to a project manager for inter-department procurement in DC. no judgement, just my cup of tea. at some point, the homie hollis and i ended up talking to a screenwriter (not for she-hulk) but i became fascinated by his stated purpose for writing, just to get better. the conversation went into morning routines. you know, the kind that, when i maintain them, result in regular updates to the very blog you’re reading, the blog which fell silent for all of february, yeah that kind. sooooo apparently, it’s much easier for me to pontificate about how much i idealize the notion of a morning writing routine than it is for me to maintain one. it’s much easier for me to widen my eyes and explain how freeing it feels to begin the day with my first actions being creative, my first decisions being for my own betterment. as everyone around me sips their whiskeys and nods, it’s much easier for me to reflect on how all my other correspondences and interactions throughout the day flow out much easier when i’ve already released the valve for my writerly ways. it’s like stretching! i proclaim. i get to go the rest of my day knowing that i’ve situated myself around my passion for writing, i get to go to bed without the guilt that i didn’t give my creative voice its moment. i guess mixers are not just for us to hear each other but to hear ourselves – to make the elevator pitch for who we like to think ourselves to be, which in my case i’m learning is completely within my control, which is absolutely terrifying. which is why, despite the impressive infomercial for morning writing routines that i gave that night in cafe bleu, i woke up the next morning not to write but instead trolling reddit rumors about korean airlines flight attendants and where they go when they’re on long layovers in los angeles.

ps: no need to trip.

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