u know times is moving
fast when
u start getting nostalgic about like
4 months ago
winter’s never been my favorite season
too cold for my poor circulation
but i do like the quiet in between gatherings
gatherings been rare these days
but the quiet’s been too
how’d we end up in this spell of
noisy solitude
?
all these voices in my ear without the
warmth of breath
been trying to make eye contact but
all i see is pixels
virtual backgrounds
bureaucratic pronouns
land acknowledgements but
we ain’t been nowhere
i remember when
even the internet was a place
now it’s just a mood, a fix
i often wonder if the gifs are worth it
the abrupt cackle while late nite scrolling
or was it a gasp
?
a released valve from
the tension in my bones from
the post before
when my child asks me
what this time was like
i might mention how
i used to strut into the ocean each day
(before i decided that shit’s too cold usually)
i stretched each evening before dinner until
my spine – knotted up from travel –
became a steel rod
(at least until i started flying again)
how i wrote poems each morning
(the kind my future self would
pine for the words to)
how the world fell sick
(yet i found healing)
or i could just airdrop him a folder of my zoom talks
a bunch of iphone pix of
off-color sunsets and screenshotted tweets
panic-purchase receipts and expired free trials
declined calendar invites and self-care memes
a sustained inner monologue about
finally getting my shit together
this is what it was like, child
a pandemic
a fever dream