So much has been said lately about our generation’s relationship with attention. The notion of being A.D.D. is something that many of us used to joke about having, until it became an epidemic that we had to take seriously en masse. But are we truly have a deficit, or are we just spread thin? The attention deficit that I’m thinking about today isn’t about the attention that we have to offer – the kind that social media corporations and advertisers are bidding top dollar for – but the kind that we’re receiving. It’s connected though – if over the past decades we’ve channeled more and more of our own attention into our devices, avatars, and headlines, who have we been siphoning it from? Whose attention did I used to get that I no longer have because it has been reallocated to other things? It’s all connected – social media addiction is fueled by the need for attention to be paid to us. When we feel lonely, ignored, or need an ego boost, at times it can seem easier and more fulfilling to post something that will immediately incite loads of feedback. But it’s just a quick hit. We all know that likes and comments are forms of drive-by attention, often with the person paying it really focused on themselves or the content (which might not even be about you). The way these platforms are set up, our names and faces take a backseat to the nodes. The attention depletes within moments. We need to re-up. As serious as it is that our own attention spans are shortening and being pulled in countless directions, it’s also worth noting that attention is a transferable energy. If the attention we receive is in short, passive spurts, that’s the kind that we’ll have available to give. It’s contagious – how many times have I been in face-to-face conversations, only to both end up on our phones because one of us felt the urge to address a ping? The desire and need to be addressed as our whole selves is something that has been around since the dawn of ages. It is the kind of attention that is foundation to families and societies, friendships and romances, learners and true influentials. It’s not the kind that can be drawn from “online engagement,” and timelines are not places to cultivate it. When someone gives me their full attention, it is disarming, satiating, spellbinding. It’s a form of magic that we all have the power to give and receive.